10 Solutions To Stop Fights In The Relationship

The way in which men and women deal with conflict is very different from one another.  For a man, getting mad is one thing, but whether or not he is able to control himself is quite a different thing.

When men are presented with a conflictive situation, they have pretty much two reactions. They either fight or they pull back. Just because he has chosen to pull back doesn't necessarily mean he is giving up.  For the most part he is just avoiding becoming physically violent with you. This is something that not all men have the capacity to control, as I have mentioned before.

Take for instance Rihanna's case with her ex-boyfriend, Chris Brown.  They got into a fight and the next thing that happened, as we all know, is that she was physically abused. Could she have prevented the situation from escalating? It all depends on the type of man a woman is dating.  I came from a verbally and physically abusive family.  Therefore, I understand that some people just cannot control themselves.  However, there is hope; all you really need to do is bring some awareness to what is acceptable and not acceptable when dealing with conflicts in a relationship.

The 10 Solutions to Stop Fights

1. Let Him Be Right When He Is Wrong.

I know you are smarter than he is, however let him win when he becomes “funny.”

2. Don’t Physically Challenge Him.

Don't make the first move to touch him, don't even try it as a joke.

3. Don't Make Childish Comments.

Again, watch your mouth. 

4. Don't Force Him to Give You an Answer.

If he says "I have nothing to say," he means it.

5. Don't Follow Him Around The House with Nagging Demands.

This is not the moment to show him drama. Give Him 30 minutes to calm down.

6. Don't Act Like a Crazy Jealous Possessive Girlfriend.

Don't go through his things to find some "evidence." If he finds out, you will be in trouble.

7. Don't Manipulate Him with Fear or Guilt.

Don’t say things like "I am going to leave you," or "You don't love me."

8. Don't Accuse Him of Sleeping Around.

If you touch that bottom, he will end up cheating on you.

9. Don't Call Your Friends to Talk Bad About Him.

You will get the worse of him.

10. Don't Play the Martyr.

Be mature and take responsibility for your 50% and let him do his part.

Puff, I think I have done some of these mistakes myself in the past. That's why I know how easily a normal conversation can degenerate into something else. Especially because we don't really know how differently men will react to the same approach.

If you think you might not be able to control yourself, then express your anger to a friend, let her hear your pain or if you don't have someone that close, write a letter. "Pain Letters" can be very therapeutic at times. The choice is yours. Make the right one.

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